30 Weeks and Counting
I realized that the last post I sent was the one about being sad and then I dropped off the face of the virtual planet.
First of all, I want to thank you for all your sweet messages. They really did make me feel better, and I started thinking about all of the supportive words you will all inevitably share with me when my daughter tells me I am annoying or tattoos her face. (Mom, note I said TATTOOS her face, piercing her face, or more specifically her nose, is totally acceptable and does not need words of comfort.)
Second of all, I wanted to tell you all that I got a new job! (same company, different department) Which is why I have been lacking in the blogging. Let’s just say learning a new job in the third trimester is…interesting. I remembered being warned about the extreme exhaustion that accompanies this stage of pregnancy and I also remember thinking I would be exempt to that…mind over matter. After all, I have a lot to do and I can surely will myself to stay awake.
Granted, I do go into work at 6am (which is about a thousand times better than going in at 3:30am) so being tired in the evening isn’t entirely odd.
What is odd is that I am in bed before Wheel of Fortune most evenings.
Also “odd” are the following things. And by odd, I mean painful / uncomfortable / annoying:
– My feet and ankles swell a little bit more each day, which is simply spectacular. My flip flips are now leaving purple marks on my feet.
– When I role over during the night I feel like I have pulled my groin muscle.
– My hands ache. Especially my thumb joints. Don’t worry. Apparently carpal tunnel is normal for some pregnant women.
– All I want to eat all day long is ice cream. Preferably Ben and Jerry’s, but I’ll settle for any brand.
– I am pretty sure my daughter stands straight up in my stomach about eight times a day. Additionally I think she is approximately 6 feet tall at this point in time…so it hurts.
Simultaneous with these odd occurrences, have been some great friends recently making plans with me for “after the baby is born”.
What? I am not going to be pregnant (and sober) forever?
I know it sounds bizarre, but for some reason, I really forgot that having the baby meant I would not be pregnant anymore.
For some reason, in my very rational head, I thought this was a permanent condition.
I suppose your sense of reason would wobble a bit if you saw this every time you looked in the mirror:
And yes. That is a pile of shoes you see against the wall over there. I am having additional closet space added for the baby’s things and that means everything that was once in my closet, is strewn about my apartment, adding to my very level headed thinking.
In all seriousness, what has truly added to my ability to train for a new job 10 weeks before my due date, while wading through piles of clothes, sheet rock dust, and paint is all of the support. All your kind words, your love, and your maternity clothes (thanks Meg and Katie, I REALLY OWE YOU) have been priceless.
But in addition to all of the love I have received from my family and friends, now, I can honestly say that every day when I show up at work – I thank god.
I have a job. I have health insurance. I have a wonderful boss.
And I am surrounded by a great group of people. In an odd twist of fate, I have worked with, been friends with, and even lived with most my coworkers at some point in the past decade of my life.
They know me.
Not the single, pregnant me – the whole me. And I feel like every one of them wants me to succeed, both professionally and personally.
I know I don’t need to explain to you what a gift this is. I feel safe, secure, intelligent and appreciated.
Maybe that is why I have no problem falling asleep so easily at 7:30 in the evening.
There are a few less things to worry about.
OH, BEFORE I GO (TO BED) I NEED TO WISH THE TWO BEST PARENTS IN THE WORLD A HAPPY ANNIVERSARY.
They are a constant reminder to me that unconditional, true love does really exist. Here’s to the last 32 years… and to the next 32.